A Great Collection of Nonsense From a South Of The Border Guy

Archive for the ‘From other latitudes’ Category

My BBQ is not like yours [How To]

In From other latitudes on June 10, 2009 at 7:43 am

Some argie immigrant from Montreal wrote a very nice text (in french) about how to make a BBQ… “Argie Style”

Looks strange... But I swear it tastes great!

Looks strange... But I swear it tastes great!

Take a look at it and let me know what you think. You can find it here: MATias Viajando: Comme faire un un asado argentin?

About “Mate” or “that green weed I drink at the office”

In From other latitudes on June 9, 2009 at 8:42 am

I love Mate. It’s a very nice drink and, moreover, it’s healthy. It’s similar to tea if you want, but you do not drink it like tea. You use… a “Mate”, like this…

My Mate

My Mate

Yes… it’s green, comes in small leaves and you use a strange device with it… But it’s not that thing… it’s Yerba Mate… And you can buy it at the Latin Store @ Montreal St. for just 6 CAD a kilo.

You can read a very good post about mate at Interesting Thing of the Day.

My cell is bigger than yours [Macho Technology]

In From other latitudes on May 28, 2009 at 9:47 am

As you may know, and if you don’t I tell you now, latinamericans and their Macho culture have a tremendous obsession with sizes. in particular with that. Yeah, “the member”. The macho companion.

So tremendous and so obsessive that they have invented hundreds of different names and connotations for it. A particular name for it that looks to be very spread in the region is “Verga” So when someone talks about the “verga” is talking about it. And not in a very educated way, if I may.

Hugo's Dick Phone!

Hugo's Dick Phone!

So if something is awful it can be a “verga”. “Esa cosa es una verga!” (That thing is shit!)

But if it’s really good… it can also be a “verga”. “Mira que verga!” (Look how cool this thing is!)

And of course, you can compare “vergas” . What would be of the Macho life ifmy verga isn’t bigger than yours… right? I guess this happens in every culture anyways.

Now, our good friend Chavez has taken the “verga” to the technlogy world and created the “Vergatario” A venezuela made cellphone that is so good that is a “verga” But a very cool, socialist, anti USA “verga”.

What a dickhead!

Maria, a story – Part IV and Last “Get out and do your homework”

In From other latitudes on May 25, 2009 at 12:50 pm

So Maria found in Montreal a good place to live, a good place to ask for refuge, a good place to work “under the table” and a good place to find love. She got married with a pretty canadian lady and, with her new couple, awaited her hearing.

When the day arrived, she had to defend her case in front of a Judge and convence him on why she deserved the category of refugee, what were the problems she faced back at home, why her life was in danger and every single detail the Justice needs to listen.  An so she did. And so did the Justice.

They sent Maria back home 30 days after the trial. Now she is living separated from her wife and is doing the paperwork to come back to Canada sponsored by her counterpart. After lots of time, stress and tax payers money Maria has to do all the paperwork the right way. The same way she could have chosen the first time.

Maria, a story – Part III “In the meantime…”

In From other latitudes on May 21, 2009 at 9:04 am

So our south of the border friend finally managed herself to get to Montreal and claim refuge and welfare. In that way, she as able to stay in Canada until the authorities review her claim and, with the welfare, she was able to have some money to survive.

Pic by delphaber (Flickr)

Pic by delphaber (Flickr)

But in the meantime, and until she had to defend her case against the authorities, she looked for a job… But wait… A job? Wasn’t she in the welfare? Yes, she was in the welfare but who says that money is enough? And who says you cannot take an under the table job to complement the income? Eh?

It was not easy and what she found was not great… Who was going to accept in the payroll a south of the border refuge claimer with a welfare income? Just those wanting to abuse the system: long hours, low pay jobs… or long hours I pay you whenever I can/want… Cleaning, manufacturing jobs… not more than that. Hard times for a well raised girl from south of the border.

At least she had known a Canadian soul mate in Montreal who was willing to be her partner in life… Not everything can be that bad!

Maria, a story – Part II “Because I can!”

In From other latitudes on May 19, 2009 at 9:30 am

So after Maria’s sister got beaten up by some neighbour, she got encarcelated by police just by kissing another girl and so many other things we may imagine but don’t know, Maria decided to escape her south of the border village.

As many other people she knew, Canada was the first option. There were many reasons but the main one was “Because I can” Because she can reserve a hotel room in Montreal over the phone, because she can buy a round trip ticket, becuase she can demonstrate she goes as a tourist… and because after all that, once in Montreal… she can claim for refuge. Or can’t she?

So she didi all that, got to the Trudeau Airport, said she was coming on vacation and, a few days after that, she just went into an office in downtown Montreral and claimed for refuge…. and welfare a few hours later. Just because she can and the system allows her to do it.

This seems to be a very generous country.

Maria, a story – Part I “I have to get the hell outta here!”

In From other latitudes on May 14, 2009 at 8:07 am

I chose Maria just because is the stereotyped name of choice. Her name is not maria, is another one but it does not matter. It can be a history of many other people around the world.

I’ve been exchanging some emails with a reader in the last few weeks. There, she let me know about her story, why she chose to leave her country, what happened to her in Canada, why she was deported back and… how is she trying to get back here.

Pic by by Vacacion (Flickr)

Pic by by Vacacion (Flickr)

As part of my almost daily English exercise with this blog I will write the history of Maria. I hope you find it interesting. More after the jump…

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Wanna play? Let’s play! 5 Questions for Canadians

In From other latitudes on April 30, 2009 at 1:10 pm

Hi all!

Last year my readers prepared 5 questions for canadians… Most of them are the things they wanted to know from you before arriving to Canada, as you will notice. Giving them a second look they are kind of… let’s say… “not so politically correct questions” but I was not aware of that an year ago… Swear!

question

The fact is that I’d like to bring them up again and, now that I ahve a (small) canadian/northamerican readership, may be we can find new answers to these old questions. If you feel uncomfortable, you can “anonymize” yourself… or send me an email wityh your answers to “thetiredprop@gmail.com

Thanks…! You can find the questions after the jump

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This week, the bridge goes towards Canada

In From other latitudes on April 27, 2009 at 2:48 pm

Because of that reciprocity thing we’ve been talking about I decided to ask my readers there in the other blog (the successfull brother of this) to talk to you. I asked them to let you know why they left that place, why they chose this, what they expected and what dissapoints them…

To encourage even more,  I told them they could eb able to respond in any language they want (I suppose thwy will use any of this three: Sapnish, English or French!)

They are starting to talk… They are shy, but they will do it! 😉

You can drop by if you want… this is the link

Those little fucking islands

In From other latitudes on April 2, 2009 at 8:05 am

I remember myself with 14 years old, getting off the bus and crossing the Avenue in a chilli morning like this down there south of the border. Once in the sidewalk I meet a school buddy who was waiting for me to walk those 200 m to school. Although I rememeber his face, I cannot remember his name. Once I met him he told me in a pretty excited voice “Have you heard? We’ve invaded Malvinas islands and took them back from the british… We are at war!”

The Military Government ruling the country at that time decided to perform its master final show and surprise the whole world with a last, idiotic movement that costed us a lot of lives…

Continue Reading after the Jump…

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